Pee Gasm

At this point in my life, I had caught on with all that was in. So, I would regularly watch videos online. 

How to cook Chicken Masala, how to improve the productivity of my employees, and how to grow organic tomatoes using UV lights. Sometimes, I would watch more serious stuff like philosophical debates about masculinity and cleaning one's room. 

Some other times I would watch videos mocking the Woke agenda, and how stupid we all were for jumping on the bandwagon of Cancel Culture. I would occasionally engage with pseudo-SJWs on Twitter. 

These motherfuckers were really annoying. I mean, next to the Woke mob, they were almost alike, if not the same type of scum, but they would use dirty tactics more than the wokes. They would find my other social media accounts and go and discharge large amounts of hate under the pictures of my cats on Instagram. They were spineless fucktards. But, I somehow enjoyed the dopamine shots when my friends came to my rescue and liked my replies, and of course, dislike the vitriolic comments left by these extreme feminist incels who often identified as They/Them/We/Us/TeamUSA.

And of course, I would also watch videos on how to increase the pleasures in life.

So while checking videos about those little pleasures in life, I ran into the "Pee Gasm", intended for women only. "Women only?", I thought. “When you have downward pressure from the bladder on the shaft of the clitoris and there’s a sudden release of this pressure, it can cause those nerves to fire off,” The YouTuber said. “These nerves firing off is what gives women that tingly orgasmic feeling.”

This is so goddamn sexist! I had to find a way to see if this would apply to men too and spread the word. Pissing was not a female-only thing.

So, the next time I had to pee, I was ready for it. I knew the steps of the scientific method by heart. I was ready for this to be a grandiose thing.

Once the bladder is full the experiment is ready to begin. To urinate, your brain signals the sphincters to relax. Then it signals the muscular bladder wall to tighten, squeezing urine through the urethra and out of your bladder.

I had swallowed lots of water, tea, and coffee. I wanted my bladder to fill as fast as possible so that I could begin testing my new hypothesis. This was huge! If I could discover that the Pee Gasm in guys was possible, I would never have to wait to go home to have an orgasm. I could have an orgasm every time I pissed. In the office, at the bar, at the airport, even in church! Fuck fighting with straight people defending the Trans community, just because they thought watching Rupaul's Drag Race and finding it amusing meant they were allies and were entitled to bully people online.

This was fucking great! I could even start my career as a YouTuber and teach other guys how to have Pee Gasms! I was so excited.

The time had finally come. My bladder was full and my brain was telling me I had to go to the toilet and release the golden rain all the liquids I had ingested had turned into. I was more than thrilled to piss. Like never ever before.

I wanted to enjoy every single moment of the experiment. So I sauntered out of my office and into the toilet. I bet I had that confident smirk drawn on my face as I moved towards the toilet. I opened the door and stepped into the little toilet cubicle that was the farthest from the one designed to host people from my office, I wanted total privacy. What if it was really pleasurable and I moaned and screamed? That was something that I wanted to keep to myself, at least for now. Later, I would make a video and put it out on the internet for everyone to try. But for now, it was mine to test drive.

I locked the door behind me. I unzipped my pants. I took my dick out and pointed it directly at the deep end of the toilet bowl. You have to be a man to know what I am talking about. I aimed and waited. I waited until the very last moment. I imagined my favorite song was playing. And I was at the club. The music was loud and the people were enjoying their Friday night. I began vibing as if I could really listen to that song.

I thought how much I liked that feeling of being tipsy and heading to the toilet of the bar, or the disco. And sharing the time and space with other people feeling exactly the same. What a wonderful thing to share in silence. When you don't have to express your feelings but secretly everyone around you is experiencing the same exact thing.

Before I noticed, I was done with my first attempt to feel a Pee Gasm. I loved the fact that I was able to travel away from the working environment and into the wilderness of a nightclub toilet. And feel the music and see the silence and enjoy the slow-motion from the strobe lights.

My experiment was a success. And I soon forgot about my YouTube dreams and my Twitter wars. All I wanted was to piss. Not only was the physical feeling great, but also I found that the seconds I spend getting rid of the urine, gave me enough time to think about things I had never considered.

I had been sold to the infection. No need for anyone's sympathy. So beautiful and free. 

I had finally found the Life Drive. And I was close to discovering the Death Drive.

Hrms Etc

1.4.2022

Midnight Pissing

 It was yet again another sleepless night. And all I wanted was to drown the time in booze. It was better than just counting the minutes away. Anything was better than just letting time slip by. And that included drinking.

I never considered myself an alcoholic. Or addicted to the nectar of the gods. Even though I constantly thought of having a drink. But instead, had chosen cigarettes over anything else. From the point of view of convenience, cigarettes reigned divine. You could easily find a nice shaded spot and light one cancer stick and get rid of all the stress and anxiety for 32 more minutes. Convenient and quick. It only took about 5 minutes of my busy day. And I was ready for more of what life had in store for me.

I was never a neurotic person, at least not in public. I had gained experience on certain techniques to deal with that part of my personality when I was around others. Yes, I had become excellent at hiding that personality trait from others. I mean, from time to time, it was quite obvious that the situation called for me to act nervously, somewhat of a fusspot. And that was ok too. I didn't mind it at all. After all, I had realized that people will judge you anyway.

I moved away from my bed and headed to the kitchen. Put a jacket on and opened the door to the balcony and shut the door behind me. I lit a smoke and reached for a nice chilled bottle of beer that I had placed there to get them naturally cold. It was a common practice in the cold days of winter and autumn where I lived. That and potato salad. But I guess you could do without a fridge during these times too. So basically, I just used my balcony when I wanted to smoke, cool beer down, and grow tomatoes in the spring and summer.

It was a Saturday, well into midnight. I opened the beer with help of my lighter. The bottle cap flew out of the window and fell on the neighbor's garden downstairs. "Shit", I thought, this is the last thing I need, another notice posted everywhere on the building scolding an unknown culprit of littering the poor neighbor's garden with cigarette butts, bottle caps, and other shit. But, oh well, I didn't really mean for the cap to pop off in the wrong direction now, did I?

I began puffing my Blue Camel's delight and took sips of beer. I puffed again and again. I was a bag of nerves. I didn't know why or what was going on. So I gulped down on my pilsner and lit another smoke. I was clearly having a nervous breakdown. Was it because the sleep deprivation was kicking in? Was it the fact that I had to stay in isolation for the next 5 days? Was it the fact that I didn't have any friends and my act had caught on me?

I felt an incredible urge to piss. Was it the beer? Was it the cold? Was it the fact that in a normal night, my bladder would wake me up at around this time to release all the liquids I had ingested before attempting in vain to fall asleep?

I gently put out my cigarette. I didn't want to damage it in case I wanted to light it up again later. I put the empty beer bottle on the floor and moved into the kitchen. I closed the door behind me and walk towards the toilet. I didn't have to unzip my pants. I loved the freedom that only my pajamas could provide. I took my dick out and began pissing. 

Pissing is one of the greatest feelings we have the pleasure to experience in this life. And, I realized then that all the anxiety and stress I had experienced earlier, all went away. 

"I am cured", I thought while shaking my penis to get rid of the excess urine. I felt a tremendous relief. And with that a strong need to go back to bed and finally sleep.

Hrms Etc

5.2.2022